I wish that I had a pair of tusks. Huge ones. I'd make people bask in their majesty and power. I'd walk around town barking and threatening to crush people with them, deep down knowing I'd never follow through. I'd go to bars and show them off to all the ladies, have them polished and waxed so they always looked their best. It'd be amazing.Only down side is that I'd probably have a problem with poachers. People would always be trying to kill me on the bus so that they could take my precious tusks. I wouldn't let em though. I'd gore them to death and I'd be right to do so.
I wonder if I can find a modern day Dr. Moreau to make this happen for me.
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