"Get the fuck outta m'way" or What we did instead of going to Joanne Fabrics

I got home last night and was watching a lil TV when I got a text from the NESF. Earlier in the day we'd briefly discussed getting together. I replied to the text and then decided it best to just call him. The conversation went something like this:

NESF: This is [desomniac]
Desomniac: Excuse me?
*grumbles*
Desomniac: Did you just say you were PMRob?
NESF: No, this is [desomniac]
Desomniac: Oh well then...this is [NESF]?
*strange noises mixed with silence*
Desomniac: Can we start again?
NESF: I'm sorry I'm having trouble communicating today.
*forgotten words*
NESF: So what are you thinking?
Desomniac: Oh I dunno, Morocco?
NESF: Joanne Fabrics?
*laughter*
Desomniac: I guess Joanne's would be closer.
NESF: Than Morocco? Yeah.

Then there was a back and forth about insecurities and the unsavory nature of the crowd at Joanne that I can't remember exactly. After some time we got back on track.

NESF: Well are you thinking you want to do something there? Or here? Somplace else?
Desomniac: Well I spend a lot of time here. You probably spend a fair amount of time there. Maybe we should go somewhere we don't see all the time.
NESF: Some where to get a beer?
Desomniac: Oh a beer sounds nice.
*I went to get a beer out of the fridge*
NESF: With some buck hunter. But not the high def.
Desomniac: Where would we find such a place?
NESF: Well there's the Loft...or that strange place next to the chinese restaurant I was telling you about.
Desomniac: Strange? Chinese restaurant? I'm in.
*chuckles*
NESF: Alright well get down here.
Desomniac: I have to finish this beer.
NESF: You opened a beer?
Desomniac: Well yeah, you put the idea in my head. Let me pound this back and I'll be down.
NESF: Late.

So I finished my beer rather quickly and snagged a bus down the hill. After meeting up we went in search of a cash machine. In order to avoid surcharges NESF opted to just buy something at Bartell's. Beatles calendar? Yes but no. Coffee's not cheap enough. Cards! Playing cards were the answer. Then we got sidetracked in the toy section reminiscing about miniature pool tables and realistically designed dinosaurs. For a moment we considered stealing all the prize tickets from the beanie babies, but that too was dismissed. Did you know that they still publish Archie comics? The checker was a nice guy. Didn't say too much. Do you need a bag? NESF placed the deck of cards in his super hidden interior pocket. I say interior purely as a guess because this compartment is so secret I couldn't see where they went. A green tinsel wreath as spotted as we left, it would have been just as good as cards.


We reached our destination and took note of the scene. The location was strange to say the least. We entered through a door that led into a very well lit room void of people that housed a ping pong table, two pool tables, Fish Tales pinball game, Cruisin' USA, chairs scattered about, a few tall tables and the ever important Buck Hunter machine. About 2/3rd's of the way back there was a hole cut into the wall. It seemed to be a recent addition as the threshold wasn't finished in any way.

On the other side of the portal everything was different. There were many people crammed into the small area. The lighting was poor at best and an argument seemed to be looming. As I tried to make my way to the bar and order a beer a man slammed into me. The waitress started yelling at everyone to move aside. NESF and an old man had some communication about how the guy was an asshole. I was order when my attacker tried to apologize. He was friendly enough in the end. Wanted to know who won the Gonzaga/WSU game. As I was sorting through all of that I felt a nudge on my other side. It was the old man who looked especially surly and said, "get the fuck outta m'way." Which I promptly did.

We got out beer and retreated back to the game room, desperately trying to make sense of everything that was going on. We started up the Buck Hunter, which was impeded by the placement of the ping pong table. In an attempt to move the table slightly we seemed to have broke it, one of the net posts dislodged from the table causing the net to collapse.

A younger group of people started to show up. It led to a strange mix. The first two of this new crowd seemed to be interested in either the ping pong or the Buck Hunter as they got their drink and took a seat in a spot where they had a very good view of us.

People congregated outside the windows off and on, mostly based on who was smoking at the time. At point I glanced outside to find a man, probably in his mid 40s, standing by the doorway smoking a cigarette. He was dressed in what could accurately be described as rags which gave the impression that he hadn't bathed since Labor Day. The striking thing about this man was his eyes which were fixed on us. It was as if he was studying his prey. Needless to say it was extremely unsettling. Things would have been different if we had The Fastest Knife in the World, but we were without.

More people showed up. This group definitely seemed interested in the ping pong table and was displeased with our presence. I overheard one of them say, "they even broke the ping pong table", which we did but how could he have known? For a moment I thought we were going to have to fight this guy along with the rest of the bar, but he held his tongue, at least while we were there.

Everything about this place seemed to be against us. I felt extremely out of place. NESF more so than I as he pointed out, he was wearing a sweater. The regulars at this place would have lynched us in a moment if it weren't for the established law outside of its walls. Luckily for us they couldn't keep us in there for ever.

We decided that one beer was going to be more than enough time spent there and finished the game quickly. NESF paid cash on the tap and I got my card back. We both breathed a sigh of relief upon exiting on the sidewalk.

We headed down to the Ballard Loft. Nice spot. I hear it's a mad house on the weekend, but it was very pleasant while we were there. They also had a brand new Buck Hunter Open Season machine. I'd yet to play it so it was exciting. Nothing of real consequence happened while we were there, which was a very welcome change given our last experience.

We wrapped it up around 11 and walked back toward NESF's. Just as he was about to turn on his street a bus rolled up that I hopped on for a few blocks up to the 7-11. I went in for some taquitos. "I'm not going to get the taquitos till your card clears. Not to say you're a dead beat but I can't put em back once I pull em out." Strange thing to say I thought. Then wouldn't ya know, my card declined for some reason. I panicked for a slight moment. "See." "Eh, hold on, lemme try this again." I ran the card through and very carefully typed in my pin number. APPROVED. Phew. "Oh I guess you are good."

"I better be. If that thing is declining I've got bigger problems than taquitos. Like my rent."

"See I pay cash for my rent. I guess I forgot to do it the other day. My girlfriend called me all worked up, 'my mom hasn't got your rent yet' I just told her to chill and grab it out of my room. Then get this, they go christmas shopping. All freaked out about the rent and then they go blow it on gifts. Women and shopping, I'll never get it."

He handed me my reheated processed goo wrapped in a tortilla.

"Me either. Talk to ya later man."

"Yeah those girls are always..."

He was still talking as I left.

Resignations of wilderness

I gave up. I don't know why planning a simple evening is so difficult. The strange thing is that as soon as I gave up trying to plan something, I had plans immediately. Buck Hunter. I don't know what it is that draws us together. Whenever I'm stressed out, whenever I'm bored, whenever I'm frustrated, when I'm dead - I'll want to play Buck Hunter. It makes me think that I should move to Montana and live in a small town, maybe Libby. Where I'd be tucked between the mountains and the rivers. Everyone at the local pub would know me by name and I would know all of them. My wardrobe would consist solely of denim and flannel. A variety of bows and lethal arrows would be seen hanging from the walls, beneath heads long devoid of life. I'd even have a fishing pole or two. Makes me wonder if it would be an easier life than I have now. I kind of doubt it. But I'm sure it would be good for my spirit, until I remembered the ocean...

Who brought the witch to the Gay Parade? Does she need surgery?

This was the first weekend in a while that I was out and about on the town. It was good. I am starting to feel like a member of society again. But as my dear friend told me society might not have been entirely ready for me to come back. While I was out yesterday I found myself suffering from a sort of turrets. Borderline(maybe a little further) comments were coming from my mouth left and right. One such instance was at the Fremont Street Fair on Sunday. A 20-something woman was walking by us. Completely disregarding the heat of the day she sported a Gothic black dress, long stockings and a brimmed black hat that rose above her head into a point. Now this woman was obviously a witch, or at least wanted us all to think that she was. So I called her out as such. There were also a couple of situations involving women with unusually large breasts and an elderly women in the PCC wearing a helmet, but I feel those were much more reserved...

I've very close to beating Trauma Center: Second Opinion. I thought that I was going to beat it last night, but even after taking down the "final" formation of GUILT and successfully saving the patient it went on to the side track that I guess I have to finish now. I cannot express how much I'm loving this game. Well I could tell you that I went out and bought the other version of it. That kind of suggests my obsession. DR. STILLES!!...

Today it's all about the Gay Parade. The Scout and I were talking about it yesterday and I haven't been able to get it out of my head since. "They gather up all the countries flags and they burn them!" It's just such a good album. Hopefully Of Montreal's next album will be more in the vein of their early stuff. I'm still disappointed in their latest...

On Saturday I found two things that should forever be combined: Buck Hunter and Deerhunter. I spent 2 hours at Redline in West Seattle going between Cryptograms and Microcastles while pilling up buck carcasses in a virtual world. First time I've played since the injury. It was so good to get back at it that I went again on Sunday...

I love that Neutral Milk Hotel was able to help save a carousel. I hope that they use this experience to put together a new album. We've been waiting for over 10 years now. I guess it's more likely to be a case of words on a gravestone: "I waited but you never came"...

I've been blogging a lot lately. This is already the 150th post. Seems like just yesterday was the 100th post...

Rainy day in May

The healing process is in full effect. The only down side is now I have lots of dead skin and calluses falling off. I think that the best way to deal with it is to get a pedicure. I've never had one. I wonder if my doctor would allow it...

I have a bunch of new music to listen to. It's pleasing me greatly. I got it all last week from a friend. The first thing I dove into was Cryptograms from Deerhunter. I almost forgot about everything else...

Speaking of deer, I'm going through some serious Buck Hunter withdrawals. Dangerous Hunts doesn't even compare. So I've been playing Trauma Center on my wii. Love that game. You have to perform surgeries and reconstruct bone and such...

I have no idea what I'm doing for the holiday yet. I think I'm going to have a BBQ with my family at some point (details are still sketchy). And I'm probably going to do something with Matty Ice. Maybe go to Boundary Bay or something like that. I have the whole house to myself so I might through a kegger for the peeps left in the city for the holiday. I will say though, keggers aren't quite the same when you have beer on tap at all times...

I need to find more guest bloggers. If anyone is interested in submitting something to the blog send me an email at desolatesorrows@gmail.com. As long as it's somewhat relevant to the subject matter of the blog (which as you can see is very loosely defined) I'll post it...

I had a dream a few night ago. Over the past few days bits and pieces have been coming back to me about it. It began in Magnolia. I was under an overpass in a very industrial area. I was following an animal which may have been Urban Phantom, but I'm not sure. As I wandered further I ended up at a street carnival. There were booths lining the streets and lights strung all overhead. It wasn't long before I realized that the carnival was full of whores. Nothing but whores. But none of them were "working". It was almost like a convention. At one point I went up to a ticket booth to make some purchases and have some photos developed. They told me that the photos would take 30 days to develop. That's all I remember, so far. Usually I can remember most of my dream and what I don't is lost forever. Its a very strange sensation with this one. Little things in my day lead to massive feelings of deja vu...

The coffee is lack luster today. But I guess that it is everyday...

I'll leave you with this..

I think that I'm in love with Twitter

So Google news is great. I love Google and the news feature is one of the best sources for news out there, but I've started having an affair with Twitter. Google isn't the best for local news stories and I mean super local, like specific to my neighborhood. Twitter however is perfect for that. I was surprised that there are so many people out there tweetin' about local happens. Here are a few examples:

CDScanner
B-Town Blog
West Seattle Blog

I've also found it handy to follow politicians and political organizations:

George Stephanopoulos
Al Gore
NPR Politics

And then there is some stuff just for fun:

Pitchfork Media
Sounder News
BigBuckHunter

I guess what I'm saying is that Twitter isn't just for extreme voyeurs. There is a very practical use for this service (even though most of my tweets are just gibberish). If it sounds like something that you'd be interest in you can check out all the sources I follow by linking to my page.

Vintage Jesus - My experience with the plastic fantastic Christ

My first encounter with the Mars Hill Church was a few years back. I received a postcard from them. Pictured was a bottle of wine with an old Gothic font that read "Vintage Jesus". Over the weekend I had my first interaction with Mars Hill...

I was a bit groggy when I awoke, late, and began to rush around in order to be ready when my sister arrived. It was Easter Sunday and while the clouds hung heavy with raindrops we prepared for what I thought would be the typical service to commemorate the resurrection.
My sister was late in her arrival, but that didn't stop me from getting coffee on the way, nothing better than seven shots of espresso to jolt you into a day. We wove our way across the city in a diagonal pattern. Everywhere we went the roads were starting to swell with rain run off.
When we reached the intended location we found that parking was a problem. After circling through neighborhood street, we finally were able to stow the car about four blocks from the facility.
The outside of the building was fairly nondescript. A gray exterior surrounded what appeared to have been a warehouse of some kind. There were young families unloading outside the main entrance in order to avoid getting the children wet.
The foyer was full of women mulling about in vibrantly colored dresses and men standing uncomfortably in suits with well placed ties. It seemed as thought the majority of those in attendance were 30-something families. Children were running all about like mice in a grain field. I nearly crushed a smaller child when he darted underneath my foot while I was fighting my way to the seating area.
The main foyer was much as it would seem from the outside. The ceiling was exposed and ducts ran overhead painted the same color as the walls in order to lessen their impact. Attached to the ducts or bolted directly to the ceiling were many large flat screen televisions bearing down over the congregation. There were rows and rows of folding chairs arranged so as to provide four aisles through the room. In the center of the room there was a sound booth with multiple people bustling about.
The stage was a world unto itself. There were flowers on one side with a white backdrop. The other side supported a large number of instruments more commonly found at a rock concert than at a church. In the center of the stage was a large, probably about 12 foot tall, white plastic cross. It bore down on the room with a sort of artificial authority that only plastic can provide.
My father and step mother were holding our seats in the center row just behind the sound booth. We were able to speak only briefly before the event began.
A group of musicians came onto the stage and began playing. I'm not exactly sure what it was but none of the music they played seemed appropriate for church, now matter how many times "Gloria"'s or "Alleluia"'s were sang.
The pastor delivering the sermon came onto the left side of the stage and began his message by discussing the Apostle Peter. His faced beamed out across the room from each of the televisions in a way that made it difficult to look at his actual presence and not the produced transmission. However it was not long before I realized what was going to happen.
The sermon quickly took a tone of denigration towards anyone who was not "born again". He maliciously attacked the Jews for making a pilgrimage to the burial site of Abraham. He ignorantly attacked the Islamic faith for believing in a man whose earthly remains remained on earth. He condescendingly attacked Buddhism for mourning the death of the Buddha. He told us all that in order to find salvation we must be "born again" (a term used close to 50 times in his sermon) but then left no answers as to how to achieve this goal other than "let Christ in". For about twenty minutes the pastor went between empty promises of salvation for nothing and assaulting non Christian faiths with grossly misinformed facts.
Luckily, or so I thought, the sermon was not terribly long. He wrapped up the scene and the band reemerged onto stage right. In the area where the pastor once stood a large baptismal pool was moved into place. A different pastor came out to announced that it was time for baptisms and invite anyone in the audience who was moved by the sermon to come forward for instant salvation. They began with a long line of people queued up back stage and the band went into a haphazard melody of songs. A few minutes into this a light show began behind the band. Just when I thought that it couldn't get anymore superficial the smoke machine kicked in, leaving a hazy fog to cover the cross which was now being displayed in an almost Technicolor rotation of light.
The baptismal fount was more like the line at a fast food restaurant. As soon as one person completed taking a set of vows that was hidden to the audience the next person was already in the pool. They must have done over 40 baptisms in less than 15 minutes. I couldn't help but think of it more as a sideshow than a religious ceremony.

During this time they were also providing communion. This was the most blasphemous thing of all. There were stations set up amongst the aisle with people distributing the Eucharist. When people around me returned with their sacrament it was not what I had expected. The small piece of bread symbolizing the flesh of the savior had been dipped in the wine symbolizing the blood, greatly increasing efficiency at the cost of nearly destroying what should be a most sacred act. I had no idea that this kind of iconoclasm could exist within a supposedly Christian church.
The service ended and we left questioning where we should go for lunch. In what was probably the most fitting of all ends we ended up at a bar called the 4 B's where we ate pub food and played Buck Hunter.
Now I'll end with a question...I have long realized that organized religion is not what was intended for me, but at what point did we start giving up the true values of Christianity for this sacrilegious, quick fix, easy answer, institutionalized hate?

Sometimes it's all about the old school.

Do you all remember Clifford? Yes, the big red dog. He was and always will be a pimp. I think that everyone should spend a few minutes contemplating his greatness...

I'm very pleased to announce that Floyd's on Queen Anne now has Buck Hunter Safari. I think it might end up being the new spot. At least until they get Hooverville rebuilt...

Chili Cook Off! April 18th!! Email me today to register!!! nuff said...

Let's talk worms!

I can barely see right now. I just rubbed my eye and I think there was some jalapeno juices on my finger. It's painful. My vision is blurring. In some ways it seems as though the world around me is now displaying future scenes, but they're very hard to make out...

I haven't been bowling in a while now. I think that I should go soon. I find it relaxing. Maybe I'll go after work and just watch the pins re-rack themselves over a plate of lack luster nachos. I probably won't...

Nathan and I went to play Buck Hunter last night. We fought through the rain to get down to Hooverville, only to find that it was recently burnt out by a fire. You could still smell the burn wood in the wet air. Needless to say we were disappointed. We wandered through Sodo to Pioneer Square checking every bar we could think of for Buck Hunter with no luck. We ended up at Collin's which wasn't too bad at all, but I still wish we'd gotten to play Buck Hunter...

Chili Cook Off is coming up. I'm hoping to get out the information soon. I can tell you that the date is going to be April 18th. There will also most likely be admission fees this year in order to help offset the overall cost of the event and hopefully get some money together for the Festival. It's going to be huge this year...

I've been having a reoccurring dream of sorts. Reoccurring in the sense that it always happens in the same place. It's never a bad dream. I live on a farm with a large library in the center of an octagonal outer wall that is thick enough as to house all the necessary provisions to sustain life. I wish I was there now...

I guess this isn't about worms at all...

Someone's listening in

I've been listening to a lot of Beatles today. It's good for the soul...

...My mind is a little sideways today. Nothing specific, I just feel out of it. Maybe it's just a case of the Mondays...

...The addiction to Buck Hunter is now very real. I had a dream last night that I was in the game. Hopefully next time I'm the buck...

...I have an even more serious problem. I'm addicted to Google. And it's not just Google, it everything that they do. The search engine, maps, gtalk, youtube (especially youtube) and even this forum here blogger. It's bad...

...I'm definitely NOT addicted to work. I'd leave it in a heart beat if someone would be so generous as to pay all my bills and kick me down a little spending money...

...Croatia hates Santa Clause...

I really need a Giraffe

I think that my sister should get a goat. She doesn't think so. She's actually very much against the idea. The strange thing here is that her husband agrees with me. And for any of you who know my brother-in-law, you'll agree it's strange that we'd agree on anything. So I have to ask, if two people with completely opposite ideologies can agree about the goat can it really be a bad idea?...

...There was supposed to be a wind storm last night. Walter Kelly lied to me. I'm not very happy with him...

...Last night for dinner Mr. Sharp made an amazing curry. It had butternut squash, garbanzo beans and spinach. I can still taste it. And I'll be tasting it even more when I get home. There are tons of left overs...

...Google is quickly becoming Big Brother. I love Google and all, but they're becoming a little creepy. Now they are tracking out breaks of influenza through search terms. On top of that for anyone who hasn't looked at Google Maps recently you should. They now have a feature called "Street View" which gives you a 360 degree view of your desired location. It doesn't cover everything but they did get my house and if you look at it from the alley you can see Jeremy and I in the back yard. Creepy...

...I can't wait for tomorrow. I'm meeting up with Nathan and we're going to hit up some Buck Hunter. I think that I may be developing a problem...

...One last thing. For anyone who doesn't already know about Bus Odyssey you should check it out. It's turning out to be a pretty awesome blog...

Back to the basics

So now that I have my other blog to vent all of my political angers and joys, I figure it's time to get back to the basic with Desomnia...

...Ozzie's is a wretched, wretched place. I attended a karaoke benefit for Children's Hospital on Friday night. A friend of mine was helping to organize it. All in all it was a great event, unless you left the upper room. Upon leaving the area that had been reserved for the benefit it was a less than desirable scene. Every square inch of the place was packed with people. In an effort to get outside for some air I had to fight through hordes of people all pushing and stumbling in various directions. And to top it all off, the bar tender was incompetent. By the time 11:30 rolled I just had to leave. Downed my long island in 2 minutes flat and hit the streets, only to be left waiting for an hour and fifteen minutes by the 7. Oh the 7...

...I'm really craving some Buck Hunter. I think that I might need to find an old version to buy...

...Oh snap, time for lunch. Maybe I'll get back to this...